The Oft-Forgotten Pillars of Health: Play, Novelty, and Connection
Modern health culture is obsessed with control.
Control your macros.
Control your sleep.
Control inflammation.
Control glucose.
Control stress.
Some of this is useful. Much of it is well-intended.
But control, taken too far, quietly undermines something the human body evolved to rely on: adaptability.
At a recent retreat, I was struck by how many of the healthiest moments weren’t optimized at all. They weren’t tracked, quantified, or planned as “interventions.”
They revolved around play, novelty, and connection — three pillars we’ve largely engineered out of adult life.
Pillar #1: Play — Why Group Challenges Under Mild Stress Are So Powerful
One group activity was an escape room. It felt lighthearted, even silly. But neurologically and physiologically, it was doing serious work.
What made it powerful wasn’t just problem-solving — it was problem-solving together, under mild pressure.
Why that matters
Research on cognitive resilience and stress adaptation shows that:
Mild, time-limited stress enhances learning and memory formation
Shared challenges activate social cognition networks that solo tasks do not
Group problem-solving recruits executive function and emotional regulation simultaneously
This combination builds what neuroscientists call cognitive reserve — the brain’s capacity to maintain function despite aging, stress, or pathology.
Importantly, this is not the stress of chronic overload or burnout. It’s what researchers sometimes refer to as stress hormesis:
Small doses of challenge that strengthen the system instead of overwhelming it.
The social layer matters more than we think
Doing challenges in a group adds:
rapid role negotiation
leadership and followership switching
frustration tolerance
reading emotional cues under pressure
These are not “soft skills.” They are deeply neurological skills tied to:
frontal lobe function
emotional regulation
long-term cognitive health
Play isn’t the opposite of seriousness.
It’s how humans evolved to train for complexity.
Pillar #2: Novelty — Why Gut Health Thrives on Diversity, Not Rigidity
This idea does challenge many popular diets — and it should.
We often hear that gut health comes from:
elimination
restriction
rigid food rules
But the most consistent finding in microbiome research is this:
Greater microbial diversity is associated with better metabolic, immune, and mental health outcomes.
What the research shows
Large-scale projects like population microbiome studies consistently find that:
people who eat a wider variety of plant and animal foods have more diverse gut microbiota
higher diversity is associated with lower inflammation, better insulin sensitivity, and improved immune regulation
dietary monotony — even when “clean” — is linked with reduced microbial diversity
Fiber matters, yes.
But variety matters more.
Different plants feed different microbial species. Different fermentation methods, spices, textures, and preparation styles expose the gut to distinct compounds.
From an evolutionary standpoint, humans did not evolve eating:
the same breakfast daily
the same protein rotation weekly
identical macronutrient ratios year-round
They evolved eating what was available — which meant diversity.
Chinatown as metabolic support
The walking food tour added another important layer:
movement between meals blunts glucose spikes
sensory novelty activates parasympathetic (rest-and-digest) pathways
pleasure and curiosity reduce stress hormones that impair digestion
Gut health isn’t just about what you eat.
It’s about how safe, curious, and relaxed your nervous system feels while eating.
Rigidity signals scarcity to the body.
Diversity signals safety.
Pillar #3: Connection — Vulnerability as a Physiological Release Valve
Some people ended the retreat with karaoke.
Karaoke isn’t about musical performance.
It’s about visible imperfection.
Vulnerability vs. suppression
Keeping everything inside — emotionally, socially, psychologically — is not neutral. It has physiological consequences.
Research on emotional suppression shows it is associated with:
higher baseline cortisol
increased sympathetic nervous system activation
higher blood pressure and heart rate
worse immune markers
In contrast, safe emotional expression and vulnerability are associated with:
increased oxytocin
reduced stress hormone output
improved cardiovascular recovery after stress
stronger feelings of social safety and belonging
Vulnerability tells the nervous system:
“I don’t have to stay armored.”
Why shared vulnerability is uniquely powerful
Doing something mildly embarrassing or exposed with others:
deepens trust rapidly
strengthens social bonds
down-regulates threat detection pathways
This is why people often feel lighter after:
singing badly in public
laughing at themselves
sharing something imperfect
It’s not catharsis for the sake of emotion.
It’s physiological unloading.
Loneliness and emotional isolation are now recognized as major health risks — yet vulnerability is rarely framed as a health behavior.
It should be.
The Pattern That Emerged
Across play, novelty, and connection, a common thread appeared:
None of these required discipline.
None required optimization.
All required engagement.
They trained:
adaptability over control
resilience over rigidity
safety over suppression
Modern health often asks:
“How do I control my body better?”
These pillars ask:
“How do I help my body feel safe enough to adapt?”
A Simple, Research-Aligned Experiment You Can Try
Instead of adding another supplement or metric, try this:
Once a month: do a challenging activity with others that requires cooperation
Once a week: eat something unfamiliar or culturally different
Once a week: participate in something where you risk mild embarrassment
No optimization required.
Health isn’t only built in the gym, the kitchen, or the lab.
Sometimes it’s built in escape rooms, street food, and badly sung songs.
Play.
Novelty.
Connection.
They aren’t indulgences.
They’re biological necessities.